Some little pre-shcool dresses, for the little pre-schooler in the house!These haven't photographed very well at all, but I did promise some pictures. Vintage fabric used in both of these, I'm liking the green theme.
'Go Yabba Yabba' is on in the back ground as I write, they are singing 'hands to yourself, keep your hands to yourself'. very catchy, think I'll be singing this for a while...
So ... I watched 'Australian Story' on Monday night, it was about a young girl who committed suicide at 18. I've been thinking about the family and the story this week.
What I learned from watching the show, is that we still don't accept mental illness, it's still seen as a weakness rather than an illness.
It made me realise that we need to talk, about anything - EVERYTHING.
Our generation of parents are so wired to produce 'brilliant offspring' everyone seems to want perfection. It's too much pressure on little people. Let them dag out, get bored, be average. Each person is good at something, no one can be good at everything, and you know, it's ok not to be brilliant at everything. I've met some competitive parents at pre-school, I'm expecting it to get worse at school next year. One Mum asked me a couple of weeks ago, out of nowhere: "Is Parker writing her name yet?" Why? Does it really matter if she is or isn't? I don't engage, I'd hate to be caught up in that sort of competition. It's like keeping up with the Jone's children.
So, that's my 'Ticked of Thursday'!
9 comments:
don't get me started on competitive parents!!! When my eldest was at kinder they were set a task to create a diorama in a box they were given over the holidays. Silly me thought the KIDS were supposed to do it so I did little more than cut a slot in the top of the box for a moveable part in the display. I thought his idea and execution was brilliant and we proudly took it to kinder after the holidays only to find that pretty much *all* of the other dioramas had been constructed by parents with a small amount of help from the children (a bit ass-about, no?)... needless to say that was quite a blow to my son's self-esteem... his diorama was brilliant for a five year old, but he had to prop it up near dioramas built by 40 year olds. I was VERY MUCH pissed off. As if the whole world can't tell when a parent has done the child's 'homework' for them. what do they learn from that?.. pretty much that they don't measure up I would've thought... and that goes for the kids whose parents took over their projects, not just the ones whose parents didn't. Yay for Ticked off Thursday!
I watched Australian Story too. Before, I didn't think I would but after I'm glad I did. It was heart breaking to watch and I felt so sorry for the parents. Well, for everyone really.
You are so right: we have to talk about everything! Normalise everything! Being average is normal. Knowing you are not alone and what you are feeling and experiencing is felt by many, many people and even by the seemingly happiest person.
Thank goodness for sensible women like you!
great post, totally agree. I hate competitive clothing! Kids are supposed to care what you dress them in- NOT! Mine loves home made stuff, and i'm sure yours loves it too- we should teach our children more about that kind of stuff than what other people have etc. My daughter's cousin stated one day "my things are much nicer than yours" and she was only 4! And her mother didn't correct her! Tragic.
ooooh yes, i'm starting to dread 2009 when my son will start prep (in qld they call the first year of school prep, and it's not compulsory yet either). we went to a 7yr birthday party and met the "mums" who are all at the school where my son will probably go. they seemed pretty friendly, but it was the barrage of questions about us all that took me by surprise. and the amount of licensed clothing being worn by the kids, and the hint of makeup on some little girls. my son only vaguely knows who the ninja turtles, spiderman, batman, little ponys,and barbie dolls are! i hadn't realised what a home-made, home-spun, home-cooked cocoon we've been evidently living in!!!
pen
Claire, I just had to comment on your comments re: "let the kids be average" YES!!YAHOO!@!! YIPPEE!!! We live in Silicon Valley, California, USA. It's not the competition at school that is so tough, it is the workload and the lack of respect the school system has for kids who are not A+ students in every subject. I will be so happy when my youngest two finally graduate and stopped being judged strictly on their academic strengths and weaknesses and start being judged for their whole person. Not every child is going to be an engineer or lawyer or doctor. We do need some "working stiffs" to support all those high achievers. Lets give them some appreciation as well.
Thanks for letting me vent and let the kids just be kids!!
Teresa
wow! what fantastic comments people!!! my boys start prep next year so i have been thinking about this a lot.
i don't think it's just specific to our generation though. my parents experienced this. my dad was right into the competition/ child genius band-wagon and my mum was very accepting of us as individuals. not surprisingly their marriage broke down.
it seems to come from people who are somehow validated by their children's achievements, placing huge pressures on the child to make them look good. creepy!
i do feel validated when i see my children share, comfort others or make friends in the park. these are life skills not achievements. being able to write one's name does not mean one is school ready either.
Claire this post touched a nerve with me oo! My eldest is 16 in a couple of weeks and my youngest is 9. I have NEVER been able to be part of the whole school mum scene as I didn't seem to fit right from the start. I tried to avoid school as much as I could after a short while. When my 2nd daughter started school I already knew I wanted to keep my distance but still had mother's asking things like "do you own your own house?" "do you work" and the bragging abour designer kids clothes etc etc. As I wasn't really into that (always friendly though) I was soon ignored by most mothers. I even found that if my hubby was there they would ask him things I wasn't really prepared to chat about!!! I have about 2 that have become friends and are my kind of person, but I still dread seeing any parents and I am happy now Bel is old enough to not really want me at school that much anymore!
Great, great dresses. So cute.
I hear you! I hate the 'Baby Olympics'. You know, I really, really hate those nurses you go visit that tell you all the things you're doing wrong.. I got one telling me that my baby really should be sitting, blah blah.. It was only after I walked away feeling really crappy that I had an epiphany and though - she's going to get it eventually. She's not going to get to school and still be lying under the kick mat still kicking away furiously.. I hear you loud and clear.
I agree - with all of it.
On a lighter note - Parker looks so adorable in that dress!!!
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